blog/enigma

Monday, December 03, 2007

10:11 PM

Yes because all my previous blogskins didn't display my titles, so I feel pretty naked with my titles for all the world to see.

Actually it's also partly because I often write my titles emotionally candidly and if you can't guess what I'm feeling from the post, by looking at my titles you can know straightaway. I'm not used to it because to tell the truth, every time I write a blogpost the title is something like my secret space where I can type whatever I want and no one would know about it.

I know, now you'll probably want to check out my archives (which I'm not going to unlink) to see each and everyone of my scandalous titles, like my crushes and carnal fantasies! Go ahead, look. I don't mind. Just take most of it casually.

Anyway, the point of today's point is about my emo ruminations. I've been thinking about the importance of myself. It's a little depressing to think about.

It started when I put that little stats counter on my new blogskin and watch it count 13 visits. It's not so much of a boasting device (when there's nothing to boast about) but rather something to satisfy my curiosity. I've always wanted to know how many people actually read this little space because I find it amazing that people would actually want to read what I type.

Then it hit me: why do you people read my posts anyway. Some of the reasons which I assume:

1) You're bored. There's nothing on telly. You open the browser window, and ahha, my url happens to be the first one on your history, so there you go.

2) My blog is actually one of those which are reasonably alive and therefore deserve a visit (which is justifiable! You have no idea how many dead blogs are out there rotting).

3) It's part of your blogsurf routines.

So yeah. I exist for no particular reason.

I mean, it's rather true isn't it. Who would think of me when I just disappear like that?

My mum would say, "Oh, suddenly there's less laundry to do. Thank god."

People who dislike me, "Ah, finally! A miracle."

People who thinks I'm okay, "What a pity, but life goes on. Ooh, Britney's on the news.."

So that's about it. I'm unimportant in everyone's life. Or I'm at least not important enough for no one to tell me that I am.

(Yes, it's pretty much a facade, but I realize life does seem to be better when you ask less of it.)

Then the topic switches to what people are important in my life. It goes a total 180 turn. I think that plenty of people are very important in my life. So I shall make it known, because someone's gotta do it, eh?

Each and everyone of you out there! You're all important to me! My friends/seniors/juniors are important because you guys make me mentally stable! And my untalkable counterparts make me who I am today. Everyone I've met, or yet to meet. You people define me. So please be notified.

Of course, special mention goes to my mother who washes my underwear.

signed, jiasheng

19th Sept
hci
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