blog/enigma

Friday, November 03, 2006

5:27 AM

I just realised something. This world needs another Jiasheng.
Although there will be twice the mischief, twice the enemy count, twice the nonsensical crap, at least both of us wouldn't be lonely.
When there's time, we'll plan a blueprint to booby-trap the Principal's office. And when the Principal falls into the tar and get stuck there, we'll laugh beneath the window sill. Or else, we'll lean beside each other and smile.
As you can probably see, I have no life. I'm reduced to this pimply teen who types out all his immature angst on a blog that no one reads while eating 'Super' Cup Noodles
(Chicken Flavour).
Which, by the way, tastes quite disgusting.
This few days, I've been deceiving myself that I could contend myself by watching my friends stay happy. When they are joyous and celebrating others' company, I shall shrink back into the shadows. When they need me to counsel them, I'll bother them till their mood improve.
Oh how noble.
It could work in theory. Why, I just need to care for others and not let others do the same for me.
Yes, it would work for some mature saint who has gone through a lot in life. Not a normal human being deserving of reciprocated respect, caring and friendship.
I'm not prepared to be St. Jiasheng yet.
I was being the usual depressed person yesterday, seeing that there's no one on MSN I could talk to that would make me feel better. So I took a cold shower and went to bed.
And woke up at 5 today. It's 5.45 now, by the way.
This morning, when I woke up, I realised that I was judging people unfairly. For one, I shouldn't say no one could make me feel better. Of course, talking to another Jiasheng would probably greatly improve my mood. But my other friends should suffice too. None of them are as good as me making someone's mood improve, but they can try. When those people in low spirits tell me that I should leave them alone, or ask me why I'm trying to cheer them up (which to them,seems like an impossible task), I reply that I'm trying my best to make those people around me smile.
Maybe not really smiling. But to feel good overall.
So who's to help me when I'm feeling down? I know Sylvia is out. She's a terrible comforter. Yet I must commend her for her efforts every time. Thanks!
Jie Xuan was feeling 'Pissed'(It was on his MSN) yesterday, so I didn't look for him, let alone go ask him what's the matter. Anyway, he would just mutter some crap and poke fun at me. Which might cheer me up. But I wasn't going to take any chances.
Jie Han would approach this in an analytical way, I expect. He might go into this debate on whether pessimistic people should be killed or something like that.
I realise once I post this post, a lot of people would be offended.
But you know what I mean. I'm half-joking all the time.
I think it feels good to have someone message me in the morning just to check on me. Which is like, precisely what I do when someone's feeling down.
Even a 'Morn'...' will do.
Oh yes, by the way, go read Huiyao's blog. I find it extremely entertaining. Link's in the links section.

signed, jiasheng

19th Sept
hci
band/euphonium
doodler
blogger

it takes a while for this section to load x) a long while.

blah, the cbox gives the game away.

facils
Sheila
Xinni
Serene
Jolyn
Weiqi
Chloe
Shermaine
Nicholas
Xinyuan
~~Jovina~~
Rebecca
hci
Edwin
BuPedofan
Brandon
Chin Seng
Weiqi
Zong Xian
Lionel
Zong Chen
Jiehan
Zhengyu or
Zhengyu or
Zhengyu
Mark
Zhenyang
Bo Dong
Jiami ng
Seanchia
Jason
Qi Fan
Huiyao
Tee Zhuo
Jeremy
Po En
Jie Xuan
Yong Yao
Bo Jun
Bo Xiang
Walter
Samuel
Our Gid
Bryan
Henry
Friends/Others
Hciband
SixAyeOhFive
PcpsP5Camp
Sylvia
Hanying
Qiya
Duxuan
Yvonne
Verniecia
Joan
Elena
Alvin
Charmaine
Chen Fang
Edward
Guo Wei
Huimin
Huiyi
Kevin
Lisa
Qiu Wen
Weng Guan
Yi Jie

designer joy.deprived
fonts&brushes x x x
images x
image hosting x
software
Adobe Photoshop CS3, Macromedia Dreamweaver 8.0